Saturday on Ventoux or “An American in Paris”

After Saturday’s climb up Mont Ventoux in the Tour de France’s penultimate stage, Lance Armstrong made clear reference to my impending assault on the mountains of Alpine France.

“I can’t complain,” said Armstrong after the stage. “For an old fart coming in here and getting on the podium, [it’s] not so bad.”

Although I was surprised at first, I am currently preparing for the impending contract negotiations with Armstrong’s new Livestrong / Radio Shack team for the 2010 season. Lance’s little “slip” made it clear that he’s aware of my cycling ability and telegraphed his intention for me to lead his new team in next year’s outing. I don’t anticipate much racing next Spring and will be skipping the classics, preferring to prepare solely for the Tour, much in the manner Lance has undertaken over the past 10 years. I will hopefully have a chance to enjoy those races after my eighth Tour victory…again, modeling my career in the manner of Armstrong’s. I’m sure he’s excited about working for me as a “super domestique,” although I anticipate bringing along some of my own cycling teammates, notably the Friday night Social Ride crowd from Higher Ground. This may minimize Lance’s role on the team, though I’m sure he’ll still be available for public appearances, bike-a-thons, and century rides. He will want to “spread the word about his foundation” of course, as he has over the course of the 2009 racing season. It’s amazing how much exposure to European crowds increases the rate of American donation, so imagine what AMERICAN crowds will do!

Unfortunately for Trek, their middle-of-the-road, yawn-inspiring piles of carbon fiber will be replaced by various steel beauties from Richard Sachs, who has yet to comment on his new sponsorship commitment. Team colors are yet to be announced, but they WON’T include yellow, nor that godforsaken hieroglyphic crap that Lance has become so fond of.

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